


The Other Versions

by evanspotters



Category: The Society (TV 2019)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Harry Potter Setting, Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, Alternate Universe - Hunger Games Setting, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Fluff, Forbidden Love, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, Maybe Smut? Idk we'll see how it goes, One Shot Collection, Unrequited Love, ill add more tags as I update more aus
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-28
Updated: 2019-08-02
Packaged: 2020-03-20 20:07:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 13,649
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18999616
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/evanspotters/pseuds/evanspotters
Summary: “Sometimes I wonder if there’s another version of this world where we’re friends.”“Yeah?”“Yeah. Where we want the same thing for people, work together, look out for each other, you know?“Anything’s possible, I guess.”___A collection of one-shots in which Harry Bingham and Allie Pressman collide and interact in different worlds.





	1. the current version

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys, so this is mostly going to be au one- shots. Some will be longer and others will be shorter. But I have many many ideas and I hope I'll get to write them as soon as I can.

“Sometimes I wonder if there’s another version of this world where we’re friends.” 

“Yeah?” 

“Yeah. Where we want the same thing for people, work together, look out for each other, you know?

“Anything’s possible, I guess.”

Harry went to leave but then paused. 

“Let me know if you work it out.”

“What?” 

“About the other world. It seems like a nice place.”

He rested his hand on her shoulder for a couple seconds and took comfort that maybe in another world (hopefully one that was less fucked up than this one) they had the chance of being friends (or more). 


	2. we were built to fall apart, then fall back together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _the version where they were still taken to New Ham, but this time they work together_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the chapter title comes from "Out of the Woods" by Taylor Swift

The house shook as Allie slammed the door and stalked inside. It opened up again just a couple seconds later as Harry trailed behind her. 

“Allie! Allie wait can we just talk about it for a second?”

She ignored him and kept stomping up the stairs. The town meeting had just ended, and she had been the first one to leave (mostly so everyone wouldn’t see her snap at him). 

He had tricked her. Manipulated her. And she was _furious._

Her anger oozed off of her as she sifted through her drawer trying to find her more comfortable clothes. 

He finally caught up with her in her bedroom but she didn’t turn around to acknowledge him. 

“Look, Allie I’m sorry.”

She scoffed and kept her attention focused on her clothes, looking for a shirt a little more harshly than she needed to. “No, you aren’t. If you were then you wouldn’t have done it in the first place.”

He didn’t respond and she knew she was right. With her back still turned to him, she started changing out of her jeans. She slipped on her sweat shorts and took off her shirt. Through the corner of her eyes, she could see him shift awkwardly as she took off her bra. He had seen her naked plenty of times, but this was different. Usually when it happened she was less inclined to ripping his head off. 

She put on a random pink shirt and finally turned to him. He was leaning against the door frame, as if he was too afraid to step any closer. 

Allie exhaled loudly and pushed her hair back to prepare herself. 

“What you did, out there… putting me on the spot like that? That was fucked up, Harry. You embarrassed me. You undermined me.” She took a step towards him with every sentence. He looked down to avoid her eyes but did not step back. 

“I’m just…” She rubbed her hand across her face. “I’m just so mad at you right now that I can’t even-” She didn’t finish her sentence and stopped herself from groaning out loud.

His jaw twitched and he still refused to meet her eye. “I know.”

“Harry, why the fuck would you do that? Did you seriously want that rule so badly that you needed lie to me about it? That you had to hide this other part of it because you knew I’d say no? Was it worth embarrassing me like that?”

He finally met her eyes. “I didn’t want to embarass you.”

She didn’t miss a beat and pointed at him accusingly. “But you did. And don’t lie to me and say that you didn’t know what you were doing because _you did._ ”

His shoulders sagged and he looked away again. “I know, okay I fucked up. I just didn’t see another way to do it-”

“YOU COULD’VE TALKED TO ME!” She interrupted him loudly. She rubbed her face again. “God, Harry you could’ve talked to me. What’s the point in us leading together if we don’t talk these things through _together_. When you do something like this… I’m not even sure if I can trust you anymore.” She went to turn away from him but he grabbed her wrists and held her to her spot. 

She grudgingly let him pull her to him. She was so close he had to bend down to meet her eyes. “Allie, I’m sorry.” The emotion in his voice made her fury falter. He wasn’t avoiding her gaze anymore and instead, stared right into her eyes. 

“I’m really sorry. You’re right, okay. That was fucked up and I shouldn’t have done it. It’s just Campbell put these ideas in my head and I didn’t want to risk you saying no and I thought it would be better if I didn’t tell you the whole truth about it and that was stupid and I’m sorry.” All his words came rushing out in one breath as he rambled. He started stroking her wrists gently with his thumb. “I won’t do it again. It’s not worth losing you for it.”

She pursed her lips and held his stare. She lifted her hands, wrists still in his grasp, to hold his face. “Next time, just talk to me. We need to do this _together_. We can’t start pitting one against the other over this stuff. If there’s a problem, just _talk to me._ ” 

He nodded and she pulled him into a hug. Her fingers delved themselves in to his hair as she sunk into him. His nose brushed her neck as she whispered. “I just don’t want to live in a world where we fight each other instead of doing this together.”


	3. take me anywhere, I don't care, I don't care, I don't care

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _the version where they both suffered loss and are pretty fucked up from it_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title of the chapter comes from the song "There is a light that never goes out" by the Smiths.

“This is stupid.”

Those three words were on a loop in Harry's head as he was forced to sit there. He didn’t sign up for this. He didn’t want to be here. 

But his mom had dragged him out of his bed and dumped him in this weird “Grieving Teens” support group or whatever.

So yeah, his Dad had died a couple months ago. He just didn’t want to talk about it. With anyone. And he especially didn’t want to talk about it with a group of strangers.

He wanted to go home and curl up in his bed again with his blinds shut. He just wanted to be alone. 

He made it twenty minutes before having enough. After he saw yet another girl he couldn’t give two-shits about break into tears after finishing her speech, he got up and left. 

He was done and this was stupid and Harry would rather be “that asshole that walked away” than have to sit there for one more minute. 

He finally made it outside and took out his phone out of his pocket to ask for a ride.

His finger hovered over his phone as he thought of who to text. 

Not his Mom, she would get mad he hadn’t followed through. 

Kelly? No, they hadn’t talked in a while, even before his father’s death. 

Maybe Campbell? Harry hesitated. That guy was a bad influence on him, but then again he didn’t have another option.

Harry was typing out the message to Campbell when he heard the door open and shut behind him. 

It was probably one of the “counsellor” people trying to convince him to go back inside.

“Whatever you’re going to say, trust me it won’t work. I’m not going in there again.” Harry spat out without looking up from his phone. 

“Jesus, I just wanted to smoke.”

He finally looked up to see who had joined him and was shocked to find it was not a counsellor, but actually a girl of about his age.

She looked like she was ready to go spray paint walls or something.

Her black leather jacket partly covered her t-shirt, only showing half of the Smiths album cover that was plastered on it. Her blonde hair was up in a loose bun at the top of her head and blue neon sunglasses were rested below it. Her excessive eyeliner made her eyes even more blue as she looked him up and down with light intrigue. Her choker twitched as she bent down her head to take out her packet of cigarettes. She patted her back pocket and fished out a lighter. 

She looked at him again and silently offered him one. 

Harry looked between his unsent message to Campbell and the stranger before him.

He deleted the message and moved closer to reach the pack. 

She placed hers in her mouth and lit it in a couple seconds. She took a long drag and tossed her lighter to him. 

Harry was used to fancy coil lighters, that usually lit up by a push of the button. Hers were cheap bic ones and he just couldn’t manage to get the flame lit for more than a half a second.

He could feel her judging him as he struggled. “Need a hand?” She asked with her eyebrows raised. 

He didn’t answer but she had already moved toward him. She stood in front of him and took the lighter out of his hands. He tried not to feel too humiliated as she lit his in her first try. The way she was standing so close to him, her chin held high, with ice blue eyes staring at him kinda made up for the embarrassment.

She smirked and stepped back, giving him space to close his eyes and take a drag. He hadn't smoken actual cigarettes for about eight months now. He used to do it a lot at parties, but then everything happened and he just didn’t want to go to them anymore.

She didn’t move back to her previous spot but instead stood next to him, smoking in silence. 

He stole another look at her and tried to bring up the courage to talk to her. She looked like she could bite his head off in a second if he said the wrong thing.

“Why aren’t you inside?”

She shrugged. “I have a deal with my parents that force me to show up to one of these meetings at least twice a month. I usually don’t stay for more than 20 minutes. But this way I can tell them that I went and they can go on pretending that they aren’t shitty parents with a fucked up daughter.” 

She stared off into the distance and absentmindedly flicked her cigarette. 

“You know, I watched my sister who was supposed to be the first female President of the United States waste away before my eyes for _months_. And they still expect me to be the same person. No one can go through that and _not_ turn out fucked up.”

He didn’t know how to answer that. Would _anyone_ know how to answer that?

His father’s death had been quick and unexpected. But even with that he had also turned out extremely fucked up. 

She seemed to notice she had made him uncomfortable and quickly changed the subject. “What’s your story?”

He shrugged and took a drag to stall a response. “My dad died a couple months ago. My mom thought this would help.”

She laughed cynically. “Trust me, it doesn’t.” She dropped her cigarette on the ground and stepped on it. “Nothing does.”

She pulled out car keys from her pockets and sauntered off to a green bug a couple feet away from them. She stopped right by it and turned on her heels to face him. 

She looked him up and down one more time before giving him a half-smile. “What’s your name?”

He tossed his cigarette on the ground. “Harry.”

“Well, Harry,” She trailed off and leaned against her car. She looked so effortlessly beautiful and badass; it almost looked like the album cover of a rock band. She nodded her head towards her beat-down car. “Do you want a ride?”

He grinned at her, something like his old cocky self coming to surface. “I would but I was told not to get into car with strangers. And I don’t even know your name.”

Her smirk widened. “I’m Allie. There, we aren’t strangers.” She unlocked her car and opened the door. “Now come on, loser, let’s go somewhere fun.”


	4. all you had to do was stay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _The version where soulmates have to be married by law and what happens when the person you love isn’t your soulmate_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title comes from another taylor swift song (i blame you maria for rubbing off on me) called "All you had to do was stay".
> 
> Not gonna lie... writing this made me really emotional. 
> 
> Also this fic is kinda inspired by a stydia soulmates fic called "Having Lost You" by writergirl8. I'm going to be real, I didn't think I was _that_ invested in the story but then the ending had me full on sobbing for like 10 minutes (trust me I'm not exaggerating). You guys should check it out it's so good.
> 
> Anyways hope you enjoy this angst hehe

Allie Pressman met her soulmate at 14 years old. She met him in English class and had quickly become his friend before even realizing that the timer on her wrist had run out.

They were soulmates. Allie Pressman and Will LeClair were meant to be. 

Luckily for them, they were best friends. So when law commanded them to be married when they turned 18, it wasn’t really that hard of a transition. 

Allie couldn’t deny the system was functional because at least she was happy. She liked Will and her marriage to him very much.

But she didn’t _love_ him. They had a simple and easy relationship, but it just wasn’t love.

Sometimes, on one of her many sleepless nights, she wondered if it wasn’t for the timers on their wrists would she have ever married him? Or would they have just stayed friends?

However, it wasn’t her place to question the system so she kept her late-night thoughts to herself.

She was resolved to the fact that this was the type of love she would have for the rest of her life. But she felt lucky, because at least this type of love caused no harm to her, unlike Elle who suffered daily under the hands of her soulmate.

Something was missing though, and she didn’t even know what it truly was until she fell in love with someone else. 

* * *

“I need to go.”

Harry’s arms tightened around her. “No, you don’t.”

She nodded slightly and her nose brushed his neck. “Yes, I do.”

He groaned and shifted, bringing her to lay fully on top of him. He buried his face in her neck and pulled her closer. “Just stay, please.”

Allie sighed and closed her eyes to push back tears. She hated this: the goodbye. It was the worst part. 

“You know I can’t do that.”

He didn’t say anything for a long while. He just kept tracing patterns on her naked back and breathing her in. When he spoke again, it was in a soft and almost inaudible whisper. “ _I don’t know how much longer I can keep letting you go._ ” The emotion in his voice made Allie feel like someone had stabbed her heart with an icicle. 

She wanted to sob. This wasn’t fair. She would give anything to be with him, but it’s the _law_. Soulmates must be married to each other: no exceptions.

Allie brought up his face from her neck to lean her forehead against his. “Please don’t make this harder for me than it already is.”

She could feel his face muscles twitch against her fingers. “I just…” He trailed off as he deemed whatever he was going to say pointless. He took a couple breaths before being overcome with a new resolve. He lifted her chin with his finger so he could look into her eyes. “Let’s run away together.”

She closed her eyes in frustration. They had played this game together before. “Harry, I don’t want to do this right now.”

“I’m not kidding this time.” Her eyes snapped back open at his serious tone. He played with a piece of her hair that cascaded over him. “Let’s run away. Somewhere where they let us be together. How about Canada? Or Australia?”

She knew talking about this was futile. She wasn’t allowed to travel out of the country without her husband present, and if they ran away within the country they would get caught in a couple weeks maximum. But the sweet hopefulness in his eyes as he twisted her hair absentmindedly convinced her to amuse him.

She smiled and gently pushed his hair back from his forehead. “Why Australia?”

He shrugged. “Great food, awesome beaches.”

She squinted her eyes at him suspiciously. “You mean the topless ones?”

He smirked. “I mean I wouldn’t complain.”

She laughed. "What else would we do?

He twisted her hair around his finger. "We could buy a big house by the beach. One so big we could fill it with as many kids as we want."

Kids. She would never get that with him. "How many would we have?"

"I don't know like five, six."

She scoffed. "Six? You want me to push _six_ kids out of me? No way, I'm not going through that pain so many times."

Harry smiled. "I think you'll change your mind when you see how beautiful they are. With my hair and your eyes..." He shook his head as if he himself couldn't believe it.

"Oh yeah?

"Mhm."

She was smiling now too. "And if they also got your brain, they would be unstoppable"

Harry's grin turned softer as he looked at her face wistfully. He moved his hand from her hair to stroke her cheek. "Honestly, as long as they have your kindness, I don't really care about anything else."

Allie smiled down at him and leaned down to press a light kiss to his lips. All this made her heart tighten. She wanted it all _so badly_ it hurt. Everything about this situation made her hurt. She wanted the big house on the beach, and most of all she wanted the kids that came with it. She wanted to do that with him: raise a family. But all they were gonna get were these stolen moments in secluded apartments and under the covers.

He pulled away just enough that their noses grazed. He stroked her cheeks with his thumb as he spoke. “I’m serious, Allie. I want to be with you, for real. I know nothing about this is programmed or even makes sense. We shouldn’t have fallen in love with each other, yet here we are. I don’t love you because fate told me to or some higher being told me it was meant to happen. I love you, Allie because you drive me out of my goddamn mind. You push me to be someone better. Someone I didn’t think I could be.”

His voice cracked with emotion and Allie felt tears trickle down from her cheeks and on to his. Harry took a long breath before continuing. “Just stay, for now, _please_.”

She was breathing harshly as she held back from sobbing fully. 

She knew she couldn’t stay, just as much as she knew this wouldn’t last. Her entire body _burned_ whenever she thought about it.

Someday soon, Harry’s timer would run out and he would be forced to marry _his_ soulmate. 

Allie was told as a child that the timer on her wrist would lead her to the other half of her soul. But how could it be that her soul yearned and ached to stay in this man’s grasp when he wasn’t the one that made her timer run out?

It wasn’t fair. This love that consumed her, that made her want to spend every second of every day beside him shouldn’t be considered forbidden. But it was the world they lived in.

Allie knew she should untangle herself from his arms, put on some clothes, and return to her life.

But Today, she couldn’t help but be just a little bit selfish, stay and fall asleep in his arms.

This was going to end horribly, and it would tear her to pieces when it did. But now, she would take as many pieces of him as she could get before parting ways.


	5. dreamed of all the different ways, I had to make to her glow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _the version where they never went to New Ham, and prom happened the way it was originally planned_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title of the chapter comes from a song by the Cure called "Just like Heaven". This song actually played during the prom in the actual show and since it's one of my _absolute favorites_ I thought I would include it in this one as well. 
> 
> Just to be clear, this prom is NOT the one in New Ham, this is like what what could've happened in their actual prom if they were never transported to that weird universe thingy.
> 
> Btw, full credits to Maria for the story on what Allie did that had them both talking about "what a dork she was" at the party in episode 2. She published a more detailed version on "what happened" in her own fic called "Wonder Girl and the Evil Prince". You should all go read it, it's amazing and I take it as fully canon in my mind.
> 
> God, I really rambled in this note didn't I? Oh well. Now go enjoy whatever trash I conjured up.

Allie couldn’t stand it anymore. She had been watching Kelly and Will dance for the past 10 minutes. All happy and giddy and so so sickening.

She looked for her sister, maybe she would provide some comfort. She found Cassandra in Gordie’s arms. They were talking while swaying to the music. The smile on her sister’s face is what stopped her from interrupting them.

She groaned inwardly one last time before leaving for some fresh air. She turned the corner as she headed towards the bathroom and found Harry Bingham sitting on the dark corridor floor all by himself with a bottle of tequila in hand. 

She guessed this had something to do with the couple dancing inside.

He and Kelly had only broken up a little more than a week ago.

“Hey.” 

“Hey.” He responded before bringing the bottle to his lips again.

Allie considered leaving, but after taking another look at the bottle in his hand she decided she could use something to numb the pain.

She slid down to the floor next to him and he wordlessly handed her the bottle. She took a couple mouthfuls and couldn’t resist the grimace as it burned her throat.

She closed her eyes and leaned back against the wall.

They sat there in silence for a while before Harry spoke again. “I’m guessing you saw them too.”

She grunted and kept her eyes shut. “Impossible not to when they take up half the fucking dance floor.”

“Yeah. Well, I don’t care.” Harry dismissed quickly.

Allie wanted to roll her eyes. In typical boy fashion, Harry was refusing to acknowledge his feelings. He and Kelly had been dating since 10th grade. Feelings like that don’t go away overnight.

“Do you?” He asked.

Allie opened her eyes and turned to lean her temple against the wall in order to face him. 

_Hell, if she wasn’t a goddamn hypocrite._ “No.”

They both stared at each other, faces inches away, knowing the other one was full of bullshit. 

They _both_ cared. A lot.

That’s why there were both here, in this dark secluded corridor sharing a bottle of tequila instead of inside having fun at the long-awaited dance with their friends.

“Do you want to go somewhere else?” Harry asked in a low voice.

Allie scrunched her eyebrows as she took in his question. _Was he hitting on her?_

Harry read her mind and added. “Don’t worry, I won’t make a move on you.” A smirk crept up his face. “I mean, unless you want me to.”

She scoffed and hit him lightly in the arm. He laughed and stood up. 

He offered her his hand and she took it. Harry pulled her up from the ground and led her out of the corridor. They went up a couple stairs and into a sector Allie had never been to before. 

He stopped at the door and smiled at her over his shoulder as he opened it. Allie’s jaw dropped as she took in what was before her.

They were in the roof of their school. It was some sort of greenhouse, with plants decorating almost every single inch of it. The sky was wide open above them and littered with stars. It was almost summer, but the night brought a chill air to envelop them.

Allie smiled as she turned to take in the full space. Harry was leaning against one of the posts that held up a couple plants, grinning triumphantly.

“It’s beautiful.” She told him as she wandered over to the ledge. They were high enough that they could look over almost their entire small town. She heard him settle next to her as she watched the flickering lights. 

“How did you find it?”

He shrugged and only answered with a vague response. “I have my ways.”

Allie watched the cars go by and the smattering of people below.

“Are you going to miss it? The town I mean. When you go off to college?”

Harry leaned on his elbows as he thought of her question. “Yeah. I’m going to miss it. Don’t get me wrong, I’m excited to go out there and see more of the world but… I’m still going to miss it. It’s my home, you know?”

He turned to her with a smile that was surprisingly soft. Allie nodded; she understood completely.

He offered her the bottle and she took it. She could feel the tequila flowing through her system by now.

The music from the gym still boomed below them, loudly enough that they could tell exactly what song was playing. Allie was content to listen to the background music but out of nowhere, Harry started laughing to himself. 

She turned to him. “What?”

He shook his head as he thought of whatever image he had conjured in his head. “I just thought of that time you put worms in my lunchbox when we were little.”

“ _What?_ ” She balked. “No, I didn’t.”

“Hand to God.”

“No.” She shook her head, stubbornly denying it. “I did not do that.”

She looked at him and his slightly raised eyebrows forced her to give in and laugh.

She tucked a hair behind her ear and look out into the city again. “How old was I?”

Harry shrugged. “I don’t know like… 8 or something.”

Allie scoffed. “Okay well, I can’t take responsibility for anything I did when I was 8.”

He hummed in agreement.

Allie thought of her past self, spending her afternoons painting her face with blue markers and twirling around in her socks for no reason. She shook her head. “I was such a dork.”

“No” Harry protested quickly. “No, you were…peculiar and… intense.”

She stared at him after he finished. Throughout their entire lives of being in the same town together, they had never been particularly close. It was probably due to his rivalry thing with Cassandra. But now, he was being sweet to her and Allie was not sure how to take it. 

She smiled. “Thanks.”

They stared at each other for a while, searching each other’s faces. This was all too new. This weird vibe between them was all too new.

She broke eye contact to look out to the city again. A familiar song played in the background: Just like Heaven by the Cure.

Allie smiled. “I love this song.”

A beat. 

“Do you want to dance?”

She shook her head. “No, I don’t want to go back in there.”

“Who said anything about going back in there?”

She looked from his face to the hand he offered her. “You’re serious?”

He nodded. “Deadly.”

She held back a smile and shook her head. This was really dorky. And weird. And would honestly be really fucking awkward. She took another massive gulp of tequila to prepare herself and set the bottle down before rolling her eyes and grudgingly taking his hand. 

He laughed and pulled her to the center of the greenhouse. She looked around one more time at the plants that surrounded them. “Why am I getting a weird High School Musical 3 flashback?”

Harry pointed a finger at her. “That’s different. When Troy and Gabriella danced in the rooftop greenhouse it was during the day. We are doing it at night, with alcohol, and this is also highly unchoreographed.”

She raised her eyebrows at him. “I didn’t know you knew High School Musical that well.”

He shrugged. “My sister made me watch it a billion times.”

She nodded appreciatively. “A girl with taste.”

“Now, come on.” He urged her forward with his movements. “Let’s dance.”

“This is really fucking weird.” Allie said while taking a couple steps closer to him.

He rolled his eyes. “Just close your eyes then, I don’t know. Try to picture yourself somewhere else if that helps.”

She raised her eyebrows at him, unamused, but closed her eyes anyways. She tried to think of a place she would be most comfortable at. Her room? That would work. She was just in her room, all by herself, listening to the Cure. 

Allie became more comfortable and slowly but surely started to sway. 

_Fucking hell she loved this song._ The alcohol settling in her system felt like the final push and soon enough she was fully dancing.

She opened her eyes to see that Harry wasn’t dancing, but instead just watching her dance with a massive grin on her face.

“Nooooooo,” Allie called dramatically. “You fucking liar!” 

Harry laughed and raised his hands up in defence. “I’m sorry!”

She danced towards him and grabbed his hand. “Nope, Harry Bingham, you are _going to dance with me._ ”

She held both his hands and pulled at his arms at the rhythm of the song. She sang the lyrics out loud and he eventually gave in with another laugh.

They danced until the end of the song in a chaotic, jumping around and giggling type of way. Allie felt free of all reservations as she twirled around in her pink dress, yelling the lyrics to her favorite Cure song at the top of her lungs. 

Harry spent most of the song jumping around and chuckling at her off-tune singing.

The song eventually came to an end and they both stood in front of each other as they caught their breaths and recovered from their fits of laughter. 

It took a couple breaths before Allie realized that the song playing now was a slow one. She pushed her hair back and looked up at Harry. With her heels, she was almost his height. She stared right into his eyes, calming her breaths as she waited for his move.

They had both stopped smiling.

She noticed something change in his eyes as he searched her face. He licked his lips before bowing his head and reaching for her right hand. His other hand settled on her hip and pulled her close to him until they were flush against each other.

Allie brought her other hand up to his shoulder and leaned her forehead on top of her splayed fingers. Soon enough, they were swaying together to the slow melody.

A cold wind rushed through them and she pulled herself closer to him. He was so warm while Allie on the other hand was freezing in her frilly dress.

“Are you cold?” He asked after a particularly violent shiver. “Do you want my jacket?” She lifted her head from his shoulder to face him and was surprised at how close he was.

When she shook her head, their noses almost brushed. “I’m fine.” She whispered with her eyes closed.

“You sure?” He was whispering now as well, and Allie could feel his warm breath against her lips.

She nodded slowly and before she had even registered what she was doing, she had closed the small gap between their lips. He responded immediately, letting go of her hand to bring his up her back. 

Her arms wrapped around his neck as their kiss became more and more intense. She was leaning on him so heavily that she was standing on her tiptoes. He tasted of tequila and of the chocolate truffles they handed out earlier and she just couldn’t get enough. As one of his hands found themselves in her hair, Allie couldn’t remember why they hadn’t started doing this earlier.

A faint image of Will surfaced her mind, reminding her exactly why they hadn’t done this before.

But the reasons why not that were supposed to be important seemed so so silly when Harry kissed her in a way that made her toes curl.

“We really shouldn’t–”Allie whispered against his lips as they walked together backwards until they were up against the back wall. 

“Yeah, it’s a bad idea.” He agreed as he gripped her thigh and hitched it on his hip.

“Really, _really_ bad idea.” Allie said almost in a moan as he shifted his attention to her neck.

They kept going anyway. Both of them very much aware of the complications this would cause, but neither of them caring enough to actually put an end to it. Not that they were complaining.

Allie pushed his jacket off his shoulders and ran her fingernails over his dress shirt. In a move so expert it should have worried her, he lifted her up against the wall and wrapped her legs around his waist. Her light pink dress bunched up at her waist as they moved closer and closer together.

The alcohol flowing through her veins made her desire almost insatiable. Allie just wanted more and more and _more_.

 _Losing my virginity at prom._ Allie thought to herself. _What a cliche._


	6. they are the hunters, we are the foxes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _the version where they go to the Hunger Games_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back at it with a Taylor Swift title, this one is from a song called "I know places"
> 
> So, this is my take on a hunger games au. it has a couple everlark elements cause I couldn't help myself but I tried putting my own twist on it.
> 
> Hope you guys like it <3

Allie heard Harry Bingham’s name for the first time when she saw the broadcast of his interview a couple days before he was thrown into the arena. He was barely 14, and even then, everyone was talking about his unforgettable cheekbones. 

After giving a lopsided grin to Caesar that had most girls swooning, her friend had whispered in her ear how it was a shame that he would probably be dead in a couple days with a face that pretty.

Allie wanted to slap her for her disrespect.

She watched him as he suffered through the games, murdering other children in order to survive. 

She _really_ came to know him when he became the youngest victor ever. Everyone adored him: the underdog from District 10 that had won against all odds. He was all they talked about for months.

Allie watched, along with everyone else in Panem, as he rose to fame. _The Capitol’s sweetheart._

People came to know _her_ name when she was reaped at 15. But two seconds hadn’t gotten by before her sister, Cassandra, volunteered as tribute. 

Allie protested and begged, and _sobbed_ as she watched her sister walk up to that stage and take her spot as tribute for District 7. Her screams fell upon deaf ears as she watched her sister get carted away to a blood bath.

Cassandra had promised her she would win. 

She didn’t.

For the next couple years after that they dragged Allie to the reaping without fault. Every time, she would have to choke down her vomit from all the memories that came to surface. 

She took solace in the fact that there was no way her name would be reaped again. She had already been called once, the odds of that happening again were too low.

At 18, they called her name and she was sure she had imagined it. Maybe she was just remembering the last time that it happened. But the Peacekeepers grabbed her arms and dragged her from her spot. She kicked and screamed against their grip all the way to the stage. 

She couldn’t process anything. She didn’t even know who was reaped as the male tribute. The world was blurry from her tears and all she could feel was her anger. This all-consuming, burning _anger._

Allie had spent the past couple years taking out all her anger at the Capitol by chopping lumber. Her sister had died so she could live, and now they were going to try and kill her again? No. She refused to let her sacrifice go to vain.

She decided right then and there that she would bury her axe in all other 23 tributes if it meant honoring her sister. 

Allie Pressman became the first victor District 7 had had in decades.

* * *

Her victory tour was coming to a close and Allie was just really fucking tired. She was tired of smiling and pretending that she was proud of what she’d done. They all kept telling her to “enjoy” and that “she’d earned this”. She would bite her tongue to prevent herself from saying something sassy that she would come to regret.

The party at the Capitol marked the end of it all and it was the only thing that pushed Allie through the night.

After smiling and talking to random strangers for hours on end, Allie finally managed to slip away from whoever was trying to suck up to her now with the excuse of going to the bathroom.

But the mansion was so big that Allie had no idea where the bathroom was. All she needed was a quiet room, away from it all.

She finally found a vacant room, with the walls decorated in purple velvet. Everything else was also purple: the floor, the couches. Everything except the mahogany table in front of the window. 

The lights on the room were off and Allie didn't know where the switch was. She walked over to the tall window and basked in the moonlight that shone through it. She placed her palms on the cool surface of the table, hung her head and took a deep breath. 

Her stylist had dressed her in a forest green ball-gown type of dress for tonight. It was meant to represent her district: lumber. And yeah, whatever, Allie couldn’t deny she looked amazing but it cinched on her waist _way_ too tight and she was having a very hard time breathing. Even her goddamn eyelashes were too big and heavy and keeping her eyes open was practically a workout. She wanted to strip off her entire outfit and crawl into bed in nothing but a loose, worn off T-shirt.

But this was her party and her absence wouldn’t remain unnoticed for long. She just wanted to take a couple minutes for herself before stepping out into the wolves den again.

“Well, you look pretty.”

“FUCK!” Allie jumped out of her skin at the sound. She rested her hands on her chest as she felt her adrenaline shoot through the roof. She looked around to find who had spoken and found a man, mostly covered by shadows, sitting comfortably on a chair. She could only tell his faint outline and she cursed herself for letting someone see her with her guard down. 

She plastered on a fake smile and shook her head in a self-deprecating manner. “I’m so sorry.” She said in the lightest tone she could conjure. “I didn’t mean to be so crude, I just thought I was alone.” 

The man laughed slightly and swirled his drink in his hand. “I can see that.”

She wanted to snap at him and say that she couldn’t be blamed for that when _he_ was the one lurking in the fucking shadows for no reason. 

But she swallowed her anger and smiled. She was about to excuse herself and leave when he spoke again.

“It’s not going to go away for awhile you know.”

“What is?”

“The attention.” He drawled on. He shifted and got up from his chair.

“All they want is a story. And yours is a damn good one.”

Allie stopped herself from dropping her jaw as Harry Bingham stepped into the light. He looked much more different than she expected him to be. He was as gorgeous in person as he was in the screen. But he was less… polished than she thought he would be. As he sauntered towards her with his purple drink in hand, he looked a lot more _raw_ than she had imagined.

The Harry she was seeing in front of her was a different one from the Harry her friends gossiped about at home.

“You’re gonna have to get better at acting than that if you want to survive.” He stepped closer to her, the skirt on her dress enveloping him. He raised the hand holding the glass to point at her face with a finger. 

“Your eyes.” He went on, taking in every inch of her face. “I can see every emotion that’s going through your head through those eyes.” 

He smirked. “Don’t get me wrong, they’re beautiful, but you’re going to have to tame that ice in them if you want to be believable. Then they will adore you.”

“What if I don’t want to be adored?” Allie said before she could stop herself.

He smiled at her quip before finishing his drink in one final sip and setting it on the table beside her. He scanned her face again, his own being a perfect mask of unreadable thoughts. All Allie could read was a hint of pity as he looked down at her.

“Don’t be fooled into thinking the games are over.” He warned her in a low voice. “They’re not. It’s just different rules and different things at stake. They still want a show. As long as you keep giving one to them, they’re going to protect you. And that’s how you survive.”

Allie wanted to break eye contact with him but she couldn’t bring herself to. His jaw twitched and his mask broke to show sympathy. “I’m really sorry about Cassandra.”

Many people had said that to her several times along the years. But ever since she was reaped for the second time, people cared about her sister less and less. Cassandra was reduced to “the reason Allie escaped the games the first time”. They stripped her of who her sister was. She was no longer the brave, kind Cassandra that had sacrificed herself for her sister but instead, she became part of Allie’s origin story. Most people had even forgotten her name.

But the way Harry had given his condolences stirred something inside her. He knew she wasn’t just a plot device in Allie’s story as most people saw it; she had been a person. Cassandra was someone who had lived and laughed and died. Someone that had her own story as well.

Allie’s fake blue eyelashes fluttered as she tried to blink the emotion away. She pursed her lips and tried to keep her voice as even as possible. “Thanks.”

He shook his head slightly and gave her a bitter sort of smile. “I told you. You have to work on those eyes.”

With that, he stepped away from her. Her dress swishing back to its former princess glory.

He looked her up and down once more. “Goodbye, Allie. I’m sure we’ll be seeing a lot more of each other.”

Allie stood there for a while, trying to shake off the phantom he had left behind.

* * *

Harry was right. They did see a lot of each other for a while.

In the next hunger games, Allie was forced to mentor for the first time. He had been one of the few people that cared enough to help her and mentor _her_ on what was the best way to get through it.

They came to know each other pretty well. They bonded over things that were stupid like rating the absurdness of people’s outfits. 1 being “I would wear that” and 10 being “burn that outfit before I go blind”. This made spending time in the Capitol much more lighthearted and fun for her than usual. 

They also bonded over things that weren’t stupid at all, like the weight they carried every day from having murdered someone.

People noticed how close they were becoming and treated it almost like a game. They kept putting pictures of them as headlines with phrases like _“will they, won’t they?_ ”. 

Allie wanted to yell at them all that their lives wasn’t something they could pick apart like vultures. Harry reminded her that entertaining them was what kept them alive.

Months went by and Allie had convinced herself that her feelings for him were one-sided. He had spent the same amount of time telling himself the exact same thing.

It took him a while to finally make a move on her. He caught her sneaking glances at his lips and that was the final push for him to get over himself and just kiss her. She responded way more enthusiastically than he thought she would. 

They had managed three months into their relationship before being discovered by the media. The Capitol went crazy over their relationship and they were all anyone could talk about for months.

Allie didn’t care so much this time, because at least they were gossiping about something that made her extremely happy. 

They spent years together, and with Harry’s help, Allie became one of the most charming and adored victors in decades.

Their engagement announcement sent the Capitol up into flames. Everyone was so excited, they said it was the wedding of the century. 

Everyone who was anyone went to the ceremony. He had taken care of their guest list. Allie didn’t really mind who was there as long as when she walked down the aisle Harry would be there waiting for her.

She had never been as happy as she was when they kissed for the first time as husband and wife.

But their honeymoon was cut short when the Quarter Quell came around. 

Allie sobbed in his arms for hours after they announced it. She wouldn’t go back in there. She _couldn’t._

But as the only living female victor of her district, she had no other choice. He stroked her hair and whispered words of comfort into her ear, but she was inconsolable. 

She tried to convince him not to do it. She _begged_ for him not to do it. But when the time came around to pick one of the victors from District 10, he ignored all her pleas and volunteered as tribute.

He told her it was the only way to keep her safe: to make sure she got out of there alive.

Allie yelled back at him that what was the point of being alive if he wasn’t going to be alive with her.

When the time came around for their interviews, Allie made sure to make the Capitol as mad as she was. 

The crowd’s screams became almost deafening when she came out onto the stage. Caesar grabbed her hand and brought her more clearly into the spotlight. “Beautiful, _beautiful!_ ”

He held her at a distance to survey her outfit more carefully. “Now, I might be going crazy but this dress looks familiar.”

She gave him her most practiced and charismatic smile while smoothing her dress with her hand. “Well, actually, I have worn this dress before.” She settled herself on her chair and her bubbly demeanor cracked for a second as she pretended to get choked up. “This was the dress I was wearing when I met Harry for the first time.” As if on cue, the crowd chorused an “awwww”.

Allie smiled bashfully and went on. “I thought it would be appropriate to wear the dress of our first night together on what might be our last one.”

Caesar reached for her hand again as he shook his hand in sympathy. “I think I speak for everyone when I say it’s a _shame_ you two didn’t get to enjoy more of your married life.”

Allie had long since mastered the skill to cry on command, but nothing about the water in her eyes was fake when she replied to him. “So am I.” She cracked a laugh as if she was ashamed of her own tears and dried them off with her hands. “I was so sure we would have time to settle down and live the rest of our lives together. But we got so many years, and I wouldn’t have any regrets if it weren’t for… ” She trailed off meaningfully. 

Allie could practically feel the entire Capitol inch towards the edge of their seats as Caesar asked “if it weren’t for what?”

She sniffed again and stared down at her lap. “If it weren’t for the baby.”

The crowd erupted into screams. Chaos broke out and Allie felt victory bubble in her stomach. Harry had taught her how to become a puppet master, and right now she was pulling all the strings she could manage. The crowd’s cry for calling off the games told her that she had played them _just right_.

As she was ushered off to the place with all the other tributes, Harry was waiting for her and offered her his hand. She took it, and watched as an almost indiscernible smile played at his lips. He pulled her in for a hug and she held him back tightly.

* * *

Harry had sneaked into her room every night since they were roomed as tributes. He wasn’t technically allowed to be in a floor that wasn’t of his district, but he hadn’t been reprimanded yet. Everyone that saw him slip out of his floor assumed he just wanted to spend some quality time with his wife and since everyone was secretly rooting for them, no one turned him in.

This time when he snuck into her room, he also brought the news that the games would go on, fake pregnancy or no.

Even though it was late at night, Allie didn’t have to ask if he was awake. She just whispered into his shoulder. “How are we going to kill them, Harry? They’re our friends. We know them. Becca and Kelly were my _bridesmaids._ Luke and Jason carried me on their shoulders at the after party, and Luke even _apologized_ for crumpling my dress. How am I supposed to kill him knowing Helena is waiting for him to come back home?” She lifted her head off his shoulder to look at him. “How are we supposed to murder them?”

His face was marked with dread and foreboding. He answered her in a low voice. “I don’t know.” He sighed and stared at the ceiling. “I guess we just hope that it doesn’t come to that.”

They both knew that it was a pipe dream. 

* * *

They had been in the arena 3 days before they realized it was a clock. Bean was the one to notice the patterns, as every hour ticked by. 

Gordie was the one to come up with the plan. They could electrocute the careers with this special wire he had designed.

Luke agreed immediately; he said it was easier than hunting them down. 

Grizz was the one to offer more insight on the specifics of the plan and soon enough, he and Gordie were already discussing what was the best time to do it. 

Kelly had nodded quickly before leaving to go into the water again. Becca had been taken by the fog merely a day ago, and Kelly was still recovering from losing someone she had considered a sister. 

Allie shared a meaningful look with Harry. He nodded slightly towards the beach and people let them slip away from the group, assuming the lovebirds wanted some privacy.

He took her hand as they settled on the sand. He smiled as he played with the rings she had snuck into the arena: her engagement ring and her wedding ring. “I don’t regret my time with you, you know? I got to love you in a way that I didn’t even know was possible. And being loved by you-” He looked up from her fingers to meet her eyes. “-was my greatest honor.” 

Harry had once told her to tame the emotion in her eyes, learn how to control it. But Allie let all her guards down and let her eyes convey all the thoughts in her head as she smiled and leaned in to kiss him. His other hand went up to her cheek as their kiss deepened. She pulled apart just enough to whisper against his lips. “It was an honor to be loved by you too.”

“Hey hallie, let’s go!” The couple jumped apart at Grizz’s scream.

Allie rolled her eyes and brushed herself off. “I hate it when he calls us that.” Harry chuckled and helped her up. They joined the rest of the team, who said they just had to gather some stuff from the Cornucopia. 

It was supposed to be easy. But they should’ve known nothing in the games was ever easy. 

Allie and Kelly were joking around when an arrow through the heart stopped Kelly mid-sentence. Her body collapsed on top of Allie’s who fell to her knees from the weight. She looked up to see Campbell notching another arrow. She ducked as he let the arrow fly, rolling Kelly’s body off of her in the process. 

She reached for her axe and swung it, hitting him square on the chest.

She ran over to him and unpried her axe from his body. She turned around, looking for her other allies. 

She spotted Harry just in time to see Lexie stab him with her sword. Allie screamed as she watched him crumple to the ground. Lexie turned to her, but Allie remained in her spot as she saw the blood already pooling around her husband’s body. 

Luke’s spear found his mark on Lexie’s chest before she could get to her. 

Allie let her axe slip through her fingers and a sob broke out of her. She rushed over to him and kneeled to the ground beside him. She turned Harry’s body around and shook her head as she took in his shallow breaths. She pushed his curls back as his face lighted up one last time at the sight of her face. Harry opened his mouth slightly, as if to say something. But the words remained unspoken as he stilled. Allie screamed when his blank eyes fixated on the sky above her.

Gone was the man that had comforted her, the one that held her hand whenever she got anxious in public events. She collapsed on top of his body and let herself bawl. 

The Capitol had taken everything from her. They took away her sister, they forced Allie to go through this hellhole once and then they pushed her back in again. But _this,_ was the last straw. Harry was the one thing stopping her from descending into madness, and now he was dead. Gone.

Allie felt someone rest their hand on her shoulder, saying words that she couldn’t register. They tried to untangle her from him but she screamed and sobbed harder, tightening her grip on him. She wouldn’t let him go. She couldn’t. She wanted to spend the rest of her days here, holding him.

She didn’t know how long she stayed there, crying over his dead body. But eventually someone pulled her away from him. She was too tired to yell at them this time, so all she let out was a feeble protest for them to wait. She searched for his hand, all bloodied and marked, and slipped his wedding ring off his finger. She curled her fingers around it and pressed them to her chest.

She didn’t protest again as she let Grizz carry her away, silent tears streaming down her cheeks. She looped her arms around his neck, and over Grizz’s shoulders, watched her husband’s dead body fade into the distance.

* * *

They had regrouped a little deeper into the tree line now so that the view of the beach was obstructed by a couple trees.

They were trying to decide how to adjust their plan to the their new number. 

Allie was paying no attention to the conversation whatsoever. She was sitting a little to the side, stroking her belly absentmindedly. She knew there was nothing in there, but now more than ever she wished there was. She wished that there was actually a baby inside of her, something that would carry a piece of him. It would mean he wasn’t gone for good. 

But she knew it was futile. The truth was: she wasn’t pregnant. And Harry really was dead, and nothing would ever bring him back. 

Something bitter and rotten took root in Allie. It was an anger towards the Capitol and Snow that festered and festered until it was all she felt, all the time. She got to her feet, disregarding the conversation going on around her. 

“Hey President Snow, I have a little message for you.” She yelled at the sky above her. “FUCK YOU!”

She heard her allies hold their breath around her. Grizz stood up to rest a hand on her shoulder but she shrugged him off. 

“YOU TOOK EVERYTHING FROM ME!” Her voice cracked but she kept going. “YOU KILLED MY SISTER. YOU TRIED TO KILL ME TWICE AND NOW YOU KILLED HARRY.”

She was breathing heavily when she finally found a camera hidden in the trees. She inched closer and stared straight at it, imagining Snow’s face as she spoke. “Congratulations, I have nothing left to lose. So now, I’m free to tell you all _exactly_ how I feel about your stupid Capitol and your games.” She flipped off the camera. “FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! _I NEEDED HIM-_ ” Her shrieks trailed off as tears started streaming down her cheeks.

Grizz was the only one of their group to react, pulling her into a hug. She collapsed against him, holding tight as her body shook with violent sobs.

In the bubble of the arena, Allie wasn't aware of many things. She wasn’t aware that her screams at Harry’s death had caused a wave of fury and grief among the districts. She had no idea that while she sobbed over his body, District 10 was wreaking havoc against its peacekeepers. She also didn’t know that the Capitol was slow in cutting her off the air and had broadcasted the first couple sentences of her speech. Her angry words had caused a rebellion in three different districts. 

Something that had never gotten through Allie’s head was that people listened to her. And she had no idea that her words would be so powerful that they would cause a war against the Capitol. 


	7. tell me that you'll open your eyes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _the version where they both study at Hogwarts_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I couldn't resist okay. I'm a sucker for Hogwarts aus and I was already planning on doing one when @still_i_fall commented that I should do one and that was the final push.
> 
> The chapter title come from a song called "Open Your Eyes" from Snow Patrol. It's so beautiful and it fits this fic so well.
> 
> This shouldn't have taken nearly as long as it should've to be completed. I've left it in an open tab for weeks and it was haunting me and now I'm so glad I finished it.

“Harry! Harry, wait.”

It was hard to find the Head Boy alone, and now that Allie saw the opportunity she was going to take it. 

Harry trailed to a stop and turned around to face her. 

“Are you fucking kidding me with this?” She shoved her detention slip into his hand and he took a second to read what was on it. “I don’t deserve this and you know it. I have never served a detention in my life and I’m not about to start.”

Harry shrugged and handed it back to her. “You broke the rules. You know you can’t use magic in the hallways.”

She scoffed. “I’ve seen you get into duels hundreds of times.”

“Yeah, and I’ve had to serve detentions for those. Now it’s your turn.”

“But I’m the only one that has to do one. What about those idiots?”

“I only saw _you_ cast the spell.”

“But they were taunting me.”

“Well, I can’t put people in detention for saying things others don’t like.” He contended.

“Campbell called me a mudblood, okay? That’s not just saying something others don’t like that’s being outright fascist.”

His jaw twitched as he took in her words. He looked away and shook his head slightly. “Why are you even telling me this Allie? Your sister is Head Girl, she could just as easily put someone in detention than I can.”

She didn’t say anything and he looked back at her. “Or maybe you already did and she said no.”

Allie didn’t respond to his insinuations and just continued. “Fine, you don’t need to get them in trouble but just get me out of this.” She waved her slip in his face. 

He clicked his tongue. “Sorry, I can’t do that.”

She balked. “What do you mean you can’t?”

“I mean I could…” He smirked at her. “I just don’t want to.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” She was indignant. She hadn’t imagined he would be such an ass. “You’re doing this out of out what? The need to be an insufferable dick?”

Harry snickered. “No, I’m doing this because you broke the rules and I know this is hard to hear but sometimes you have to face the consequences.”

“Oh that’s rich, coming from you.” She stepped closer to push her finger against his chest. “A self-conceited rich-boy.”

“Well, at least I’m not an entitled brat.”

She wanted to punch him so bad. “You’re going to retract this.”

“Oh yeah?” Something shifted in his face as he said the next sentence. “ _Make me_.”

She really wished he hadn’t said that.

The small distance between them disappeared as they moved towards each other in sync. Her hands were already in his hair when his lips met hers. 

She hated him. She wanted to hit him. She also wanted to take him into the broom closet and lick that dip above his collarbone.

She chose to do the latter.

“Allie fucking Pressman.” He whispered as he shut the door behind them. “Who knew?”

“Shut up.” She started loosening his tie. “Don’t speak. This didn’t happen. It doesn’t mean anything and we will never do this again, agreed?”

He nodded. “Agreed.”

It happened again. 

And again. 

And again.

Before Allie knew it they had even come up with a code. A tug of her ear was all it took for him to know to meet her in the broom closet in the West Wing.

It was their secret. Her guilty pleasure.

They had talked about rules after the fourth time. The biggest one was: no one could know. _No one_ and especially not Cassandra. 

To prevent people from knowing, they had set a rule that they couldn’t approach each other in public.

Allie was on her way to Charms when Harry broke that rule for the first time. She was talking to Elle when she felt someone grab her wrist. 

She looked at who was pulling her away and immediately started to protest. “Harry, what are you doing?”

He ignored her and pulled her into an empty classroom. He shut the door behind him and she was already yelling as he turned around to face her.

“Are you insane? You can’t just come up to me like that. What if someone saw us?”

He didn’t say anything. Harry just tightened his green tie while avoiding eye contact. The way his jaw shifted told her this wasn’t going to be like their other secret shags. He finally looked up and took a couple steps towards her. “Are you going to Hogsmeade with Will LeClair?”

Allie’s stomach sunk to her feet. She didn’t want to talk about this. She started walking towards the door. “I can’t do this right now, I have Charms.”

He moved to block her way. “You and I both know that Elle will cover for you. Now, are you going with him or not.”

She sighed as she realized there was no way to avoid it. “How did you hear about that?”

“It doesn’t matter.” He shook his head. “Are you?”

Despite the way it made her skin crawl, Allie didn’t see the point in denying the truth. “Yeah, I am.”

He gave a cynical laugh and muttered almost to himself. “I can’t believe it.” His voice returned to its normal volume. “I didn’t know we were doing that, you know, the ‘seeing other people thing.’”

Allie leveled a stare. “I wasn’t aware we were even seeing _each other_.”

Harry stepped closer to her. “Why aren’t we seeing each other? I mean we’ve done almost everything that a couple usually does.”

She was momentarily thrown off by how close he’d gotten. She had to lift her chin slightly to meet his eyes. “We talked about this, it’s just too complicated.”

“Fuck complicated.” He lowered his voice. “It doesn’t have to be complicated.”

“Well, it is. It wouldn't work; we fight all the time.”

“No, we don't.”

“Yes, we do.”

“No, we don't.”

“Yes, _we do!_ ” She raised her hands in exasperation. “SEE! Now we’re fighting about whether we fight or not.”

“Allie, stop with the excuses.” He deadpanned, done with his teasing. “You and I both know the reason you don’t want to give us a shot is because you don’t want to face your sister.”

“That’s not true.”

“Yes, it is.” He pointed a finger at her accusingly. “You’re scared of what she’ll think when she finds out about us.”

“Us? There is no us, Harry. Yes, we fuck every once in a while, but that doesn't make you my goddamn soulmate.” 

“That’s bullshit, Allie! We’re so much more than that and I’m tired of you hiding from that!” He put his hand in his hair in exasperation before turning back to her. “Fine, you know what?” She took a tiny step back so they wouldn’t be flush against each other. “Look into my eyes and tell me that this is all in my head and I’ll go.”

She hesitated. 

She wanted to say it. Say it right to his face that he didn’t mean anything to her. She wanted to tell him that this was all in his head and then she could return to her regular life. 

But what Allie really, truly wanted to do was say _fuck it_ and kiss the lips she had come to know so well. 

She was about to do just that when Cassandra’s face popped up in her head. The perfect and kind Head Girl called Cassandra. The one who would be so disappointed when she found out that her little sister was sleeping with a guy she had a rivalry with since first year. 

She buried whatever feelings she might have for him and stared at his eyes in the coldest way she could manage. “You mean nothing to me.”

The way his face fell told her she had managed to sound convincing. She felt her heart physically breaking as he stepped away from her. He stalked out and left her without another word. 

Allie collapsed on one of the desks. She sniffed and wiped at her eyes before anything could come down. She had made the right choice. It was too complicated. It wasn’t worth it. She kept repeating all of that in an attempt to convince herself she hadn’t fucked up with no success. 

* * *

Allie had never been so bored on a date before. No, okay, it wasn’t _that_ bad. It was just… fine? 

She enjoyed Will. He was one of her longest friends. But going to Hogsmeade with him was kind of like watching a movie you’ve already seen before. You were still mildly enjoying it but the charm, and intrigue of it were just gone. The plot was predictable and a lot less interesting.

She had had a crush on Will for a long time; this should’ve felt amazing. But there was something missing: a fire and a passion and honestly, just the basic desire to spend time near him. And right now she would much rather be taking a nap in her dorm than be having this conversation with him. 

Will was talking to her about his Herbology assignment? At this point, she wasn’t really sure. 

She was currently listing everything she would need to get done after this date was over in her head. She had to finish that Transfiguration essay. Ooh, she could also finally finish that book she’d been reading forever. Cassandra had recommended it to her. It was something about teens being trapped in an alternate universe without parents or something like that. 

A wave of cold air rushed through the Three Broomsticks. On instinct, Allie looked over Will’s shoulder to see who had walked in. Her heart stopped as she saw Harry traipse in with an arm around Kelly’s shoulder. 

She averted her eyes fast, refusing to let him see her staring. But of course, _of course,_ the couple settled in the booth behind them. 

Allie pursed her lips as she heard Kelly laugh at something Harry said. 

She knew she would do something she would regret if she didn’t get out of there fast. 

She downed the rest of her butterbeer in one sip and wiped her lips. “I’m going to get another one.”

“No, no. It’s okay, let me.” Will protested.

“It’s fine. See? I’m already up.” She snatched her purse and made her way to the counter. 

She rolled her eyes as Harry took the space next to her. 

“What are you doing here?” She spoke through gritted teeth. 

He shrugged, completely nonchalant. “I’m just getting a couple butterbeers.”

“Oh, you mean for you and your date?” It slipped out before Allie could stop herself. 

Harry wasn’t looking at her, but instead was searching for Rosmerta. The light smirk at his lips told her she had asked a little too harshly to be considered casual. 

He leaned his arms against the sticky counter and turned to her. “What are you? Jealous?”

“No.” She said quickly. “I'm just confused. I didn't think you were into Ravenclaws.”

“They’re alright.” He started looking for Rosmerta again. “You see, I used to have things for spiky Gryffindors but that turned sour really fast.”

“Oh yeah?” Her voice was dripping with sass. “What happened? She saw how much of a dick you really are and thought better of it?”

“No.” He shook his head, still not directly looking at her. “She started to have feelings for me but was too scared to face them.”

She scoffed. “Merlin, you really are a self-centered bastard.”

“Hm.” He hummed as if he was considering a light statement about the weather. He turned to her with a winning smirk on his lips. “If I’m wrong then why are you here talking to me instead of your date?”

She leveled a stare. “I’m here because I want a drink.” She waved at Rosmerta who finally made her towards them. “Hi Rosmerta, may I have another butterbeer please?”

“I’d also like two butterbeers, thanks.” Harry said, taking advantage of Rosmerta’s attention. 

Rosmerta smiled at both of them and went to get their drinks. 

Allie grabbed Harry’s wrist as it dropped to his side. “Asking her out just to make me jealous is a pretty dick move, Harry.”

He gave a derisive laugh. “Now, look who’s being self-centered? Maybe I asked Kelly to Hogsmeade because she’s pretty and I fancy her. Maybe I asked her because the girl I can’t stop thinking about told me I was nothing to her and I thought it was time to move on.”

How was he able to do that? Just expose himself and all his feelings so off-handedly? She tightened her fingers on his wrist. “Harry…”

She stopped whatever she was going to say and let go of his wrist as Rosmerta came back with their drinks. They both handed her their coins and she left to tend to other customers. 

Harry spoke to her in a low voice and stepped closer to her, loosely intertwining his own fingers around her hand. “If you want me, Allie, then you have to tell me. Agrippa, I’d drop everything to be with you if you told me that’s what you wanted. But you can’t have it both ways.” He searched her face desperately and shook his head slightly. “You can’t say we’re nothing to each other and then get jealous when I start to see other people. It’s not fair to me. Either we do this for real… or we let go of each other for good.”

She opened her mouth to say something but no words came out. She just didn’t know what to say.

“Yeah.” He nodded and untangled his wrist from her grip. “That’s what I thought.” He grabbed his butterbeers and brushed past her to meet his date. 

Allie closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She felt disoriented and dizzy and she wanted to sit down. 

But she had a date to get back to. _Right._ Her date. That’s what she had to do, get back to Will and finish her date. 

It sounded so easy, and yet she felt like she was wading through water; numb.

Allie couldn’t shake that feeling for the next couple weeks. It was like her heart had hardened and turned into solid rock.

She missed Harry. All the time. She kept catching sight of him at the Great Hall. Just laughing and spending time with his other Slytherin friends. It hurt seeing him like that knowing there was no way she could take part in that happiness. It hurt so much that she started skipping meals altogether.

She hadn’t seen Will since their date in Hogsmeade. At the end of it, she had talked to him and he also agreed that maybe they were better off as friends.

She was also avoiding Cassandra like the plague. Talking to her made her feel too many things. She felt guilty for hooking up with Harry, scared that she would find out her secret, resentment because Cassandra was one of the reasons she couldn’t be with him. 

One particular day, she had skipped lunch as usual. She had snuck some snacks from the kitchens and had taken to read in her favorite nook in the castle. 

She wasn’t expecting company so she basically jumped out of her skin when Cassandra joined her. 

“Hi stranger.” 

Allie bent her legs to give Cassandra space to settle in the space in front of her. She lowered her book and gave her a half smile. “Hi.”

“I haven’t seen you around in a while.” 

“Yeah.” Allie shrugged. “Sorry, I’ve just been busy.”

“Or you’ve been avoiding me.” She said. 

Allie said nothing and chose to trace the cover of her book. She knew lying was pointless; Cassandra knew her too well. 

“Come on, Allie, what’s been going on with you?” She leaned over to rest her hand on Allie’s knee. “Lately, you’ve been kind of… out of it.”

She looked out the window. She could see the rain making the lake ripple in the distance. “I don’t know. I guess I don’t really want to talk about it.”

She couldn’t see Cassandra’s face but she could imagine her sister biting her lip in thought. “Allie… Whatever it is you’re going through, you don’t have to hide it from me. If you want to then that’s fine. I just…” She sighed and swung her legs off the ledge. “I just want you to be happy.”

Allie looked away from the window and down at her lap as her eyes started to water. Her sister had moved to stand next to her and pulled her into a hug. She wrapped her arms back around her and buried her head into Cassandra’s shoulder. 

Allie had needed this hug and its comfort more than she realized.

She spent the next couple weeks turning over Cassandra’s words in her head. _I just want you to be happy_.

She thought about them over and over again, thinking what happy would look like for her. Because right now, this sure in hell wasn’t it. 

And one afternoon, while she was reading by the lake with Elle at her side, she looked over at a particularly rowdy group of boys underneath a beech tree, and finally faced the answer to the question. 

The even bigger question was now: _what was she going to do about it?_

All she needed was five minutes of bravery. Five minutes of bravery and she would maybe, possibly, find her happiness. 

She made her decision and snapped her book shut. She got up and ignored Elle’s questions as she walked over to them, conjuring up every ounce of Gryffindor bravery inside of her. Her eyes were trained on Harry but he hadn’t seen her yet. He was too focused on Jason’s and Clark’s wrestling next to him. His laugh just convinced her even further that she needed to do this. 

Grizz was the first one to see her, looking up from his book while she was still a couple steps away. “Hey, Allie. What’s up?”

She held her breath as Harry finally turned his head to look at her. His gaze burned her more than the sun shining down above her. 

She released her breath and pushed her hair back to resist from fidgeting. “I wanted to talk to Harry for a second.”

He gaped up at her for a second, unmoving.

“Why?” Clark asked bluntly.

That seemed to break Harry from his reverie. He smacked Clark as he started getting up. “Just shut up, Clark.”

He was suddenly right in front of her and Allie was shaken for a second. She hadn’t been this close to him in weeks.

Allie basked in his attention when he looked into her eyes for the first time in a while. They were as warm and as charming as she remembered. He muttered to her in low voice. “Hey.”

She didn’t let him say anything else and grabbed his face to pull him in for a kiss. He froze for a second but before she knew it, he had one hand on her back and the other one curled in her hair as pulled her closer. 

The loud cat calls all around them brought her to the present and she pulled away from him.

She smiled as she saw that his eyes were still closed. He opened them slowly and blinked at her, unbelieving.

“Did you just kiss me in front of people?”

“Yeah.” She sounded dazed. “I just kissed you in front of people.”

She started smiling and he started grinning right back at her. The hollers of their friends (mostly Clark and Jason) around them were almost deafening. 

“Do you want to get out of here?”

“Yeah.” She nodded and reached for his hands. “As long as you promise to go out with me this Friday.”

His smile was almost blinding as he stroked her palms with his thumbs. “Okay. It’s a date.”


	8. someone will love you, but someone isn't me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _the version where he fucks up and she ends up marrying someone else_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's been a while since I updated so I thought i'd post this one. It's really short and honestly just trash and I'm really sorry.
> 
> The chapter title comes from the song Sorry by Halsey.

“Harry!” 

He stopped in his tracks and cursed at the way his heart still skipped a beat at the sound of her voice. 

His heart tightened as Allie came closer into his view. She really was the most beautiful bride he had ever seen. He wondered what it would’ve been like to have been the one waiting for her at the end of the aisle. The one that got to marry this spectacular, beautiful woman. But he fucked up and now he was the guy sitting in the second to last row watching from afar. 

“You’re leaving?” Allie asked. 

He couldn’t stare at her too long, it was like looking at the sun. “Yeah, my flight leaves early tomorrow so I thought it was time to get back.”

She nodded. “Okay.” She looked like she was considering saying something else. 

Harry could still trace every single freckle on her body by memory. He knew how to interpret all her different laughs and stares. He knew her favorite songs and he knew what type of tea she liked to drink when she was sad. But he felt like he was looking at the Allie in front of him through a glass wall. She was _right there_ , but at the same time so far away. 

The Allie in front of him felt like a little more than a stranger. 

She tucked a fallen strand from her updo behind her ear as she studied him. Her blue eyes looked glassy and he couldn’t tell if he was imagining it. “I hope you know how much it means to me that you came.”

He didn’t know what to say. He pulled whatever strength he had left in him to give her a lopsided grin. 

She took a couple steps to wrap her arms around his neck and pull him into a hug. 

He stood there for a second, overwhelmed by the familiar smell of her perfume. He breathed her in and put his arms around her waist. She still fit so perfectly in his arms. It had been a while since he’d held her like this and it felt amazing and painful at the same time. 

He loved her and he couldn’t have her. And it was killing him. 

She started to unravel herself from him to rest her hands on his chest. “Even after everything went down with us…” Her eyes lifted from the ground to rest on his face. “You’re still one of my favorite people.”

He wanted to tell her that she wasn’t “one of” his favorite people; she was his absolute favorite person in the world. He wanted to tell her how he couldn’t stop thinking about her. He wanted to say how he thought about that night (the one where everything went to shit) all the time. How if he could he would turn back the clock and tell himself to stop being such a coward and to stop running away from happiness. He would have told himself to propose to Allie on the spot instead of spouting out some bullshit about marriage being “a stupid contract” and refusing to take their relationship to the next level.

If this wedding was happening a couple years back, he would’ve been able to be a little bit selfish and tell her all of that. But he had grown a lot since then. He battled his depression and managed to heal that self-sabotaging part of himself that strived to ruin everything good in his life, especially his relationship with her. Now, Allie was married and most importantly: happy. His love would just confuse her and he couldn’t bring that pain on her.

So he settled for a half-truth. “You look really beautiful.” 

She smiled at him, her blue eyes crinkling up in the corners.“Thank you.” 

She was just so flawless, he couldn’t stop staring. He could stand there forever just looking into her eyes.

But a voice drew him back to reality. “Allie?” Cassandra glided down the steps, lifting her bridesmaid dress on the way. Her eyes moved from her sister and on to Harry. Cassandra’s features remained polite but Harry knew her well enough to see the hate seeping through her mask. 

She gave him a hard smile. “Hi, Harry.”

He had never been Cassandra’s favorite person. In the five years he dated Allie, Cassandra had always made it very clear that she only tolerated him for her sister’s sake. He could only imagine what she thought of him now after he’d broken her little sister’s heart.

Cassandra turned back to her sister. “Allie, they’re waiting for you to cut the cake.”

Allie turned back to face Harry. “I’m sorry, I have to go.”

He shook his head. “Don’t be! It’s your wedding after all. Go and enjoy it.” He pointed at his car with his thumb. “I should get going too.”

She nodded. “Right.” She took one last breath, searching his face with those gorgeous ice blue eyes. “Goodbye, Harry.”

The way she said his name almost sounded like it was the key to all the secrets of the universe. It hit him that that would probably be the last time he would be hearing her voice.

“Goodbye, Allie.”


End file.
